A New Beginning

Jess, Jayden, and I got to see a beautiful sunrise this morning.  True, Jess was running up our driveway carrying Jayden, while I trotted along behind with the camera because the bus was 5 minutes early, but it was still beautiful.

Yes, Jayden started school today, I know most people who read this already have kids and school, so I won't bore you with the details, but I digress.  He's my first, and it was all too obvious this morning.  We decided not to tell him he was starting today, so he would sleep last night, but this also made him unsure that it was really happening.  He was too excited to eat breakfast, and curiosity overwhelmed him.  As I said before, we ended up running up the drive to meet the bus since it was early, and the symbolism was too obvious.  There we were rushing to get our kid on the bus, rushing to send him to school, rushing to get him out in the world.  We honestly tried to make the most of our time with him the last few years, but now it seems all rushed.  We can only pray that we have influenced him in such a way to do what is right without us around now.  As for what he thought about the ordeal, Jess and I waited next to his window to wave goodbye as he drove off, but he never looked out the window.  Once he stepped on the bus, he was ready to meet life head on.  Good luck little buddy.  Mommy and daddy are praying for you.

Home and happy.

We are working like crazy trying to get settled in to the new house.  Lots of unpacking, lots of wasp killing, and lots of water leaks to fix.  I have spent way too much time stuck in the crawl space under our master bath.  I am no plumber, but it drives me crazy to know what is wrong and not be able to fix it, so I will keep trying.  Sooner or later I will be able to actually take a shower in my shower.  Until then, we will continue to hang out on the back deck watching the sun set.  I think I can survive.

Excitement vs Enthusiasm

For those who missed out, I got my first snake at the new house today.  It was hiding in a humidifier box.  Glad I found it now.  We love our new house, and are enjoying every moment we spend there.  We are also exhausted though.  A friend of mine once told me that when we are tired we are more easily broken, and when we are broken is when God shows up.

I am thrilled about starting our Celebrate Recovery tonight, and am looking forward to what God is going to do with it.  We are starting small to get the kinks out, so that we will be prepared for the blessings I know God has for me.  I never thought I would need CR, until I started preparing for it.  I can't believe how much it has helped me, and know it God will use it to help many others.  We will be watching an intro video from Saddleback tonight for any who are interested.

I'm not a dr.

We are in our house.  Yeah!  I went to the doctor today to see if he could help me get rid of this rediculous cough I have.  I like my new dr.  The office is really clean, well kept.  It has nice chairs and plenty of flat panel tvs.  The receptionist and nurses are always friendly and do their jobs well.  The doctor told me I had a cough.  Thanks doc.  Had I known that maybe I wouldn't have come.  Good grief.  A few antibiotics and call him if it doesn't go away.

Then I was vaccuuming the church I realized I was making it nice to look at, we have nice tvs, friendly reception people, and most people are friendly to people when they come in.  Unfortunately, that is not what people need.  They come because they are sick, they are looking for some way to get better.  I don't see us pastors as doctors, more like pharmacists.  We are just reading what the doctor wrote (occasionally having to translate!), and telling people how follow the doctor's orders.  I wish I could go to Dr Jesus.  No copay.

No more sleeps

The day is here!  Jayden is confused because he knows we get in our house today, but isn't there yet.  He also went to his school to meet his class and leave all his school supplies, but had to leave afterward.  He wants his stuff.  We want our stuff (it's in the new house).  We talked to Jayden about Mexico today and how they don't have near as much stuff.  How the people there are more poor.  If you've been to Mexico, you understand what that means.  You also understand that they are, for the most part, able to enjoy life more than us.  They have learned to enjoy what they do have, and not worry so much about stuff.  I like stuff, I like the big TV, all of "Jayden's" toys, I'm even excited about a lawn tractor.  The last couple months has helped me realize that I don't need that stuff to be happy.  I feel closer to my wife than ever, because we were bored out of our minds and in desperation for most of the time.  I have my God, my family, and my church.  That's all I need.  (I will still enjoy all my stuff though!)

Daily Life Continues

We spent this morning meeting some of the faculty at Jayden's school (yes, he is starting school next Tuesday).  There was a lot of talk about how bad the winter is there, hopefully we will have a plow.  Of coarse, we would like to be in the house too.

We arrived at church to find that Pastor Hart had accidently flooded the baptistry over.  It is a nice mess.  I told Pastor I was glad he did it and not Andrew or me.  I think he understood.  We have staff meeting next to plan for the fall.

Life is filled with ups and downs.  New beginnings, big messes, cleaning up, then planning on how to make things better for the future.  It's a daily thing.  I personally find myself the most happy when I'm problem solving.  It's refreshing to see something that is broken start to work properly again.  I think God enjoys that too.  How incredible it must be to him to see someone who is totally messed up finally allow Him to fix them, make them whole.  I want to be whole, I want my family to be whole, and I want my church to be whole.  If there is one thing I've had crammed into my mind lately, it's that I can't make any of that whole.  If I could fix it, I would have, but I can't, so I don't.  Thank God I'm not Him (I'm sure everybody else does too!)

Prep Work

I always tell others they should blog, but never actually do it myself, so I'm gonna try to start. If I don't keep up with it, I'll just be one more who thought it was a good idea, but never took the time to blog.

I have decided God wants me to be more patient. As I have immersed myself in Celebrate Recovery (CR) I have found plenty of my personal faults. One of them has always been patience. I know that. I didn't need help being reminded. Apparently God wants to help me with that. We have been without a home for 2 months now. We have had family who were kind enough to take us in, and have been staying at Perth Bible for a month, but it isn't home. I want to be home. Anyway, for the upteenth time we have been told we will be in our house this week. I find it hard to accept. I am definitely learning the art of patience.

We start our CR at Sonrise this Friday. I am pumped because I know what the program can mean to our church and our community. I don't think there is one person out there who cannot benefit from CR, and I know some people absolutely will love it if they give it a chance. We have a group of leaders who are all about being there to help other people overcome their own hurts, hangups, and habits. It is Christian community portrayed to its fullest. I can't wait.

I, with the rest of Sonrise, am saddened for the Barkman family. I was only able to meet Randy once, but it was enough to give me peace. Randy boldly told Andrew, Ian and me that he had made peace with God and accepted His forgiveness. The knowledge that someone is in Heaven now makes things a lot easier, but there is still sadness and mourning to be done. I know our church family will continue to be there for Trish and Derek through this, and it will be a long, difficult process, but the peace that God gives us for eternity is an incredible thing.